All this talk about childhood obesity and health care has hidden perhaps a symptom of the American way of life: Our belief that we’re hotter than anybody else on the planet.

I mean, Americans have style of course, but the big fashion houses we aspire to embody — Gucci, Prada, etc. — are all European.

I mean, sure some of them may sound cooler than us (Et tu, cute’?) but deep down we’ve always thought of ourselves as really good-looking folks.
But not if we keep eating like we’re eating.
Actually it may already be too late. See, baby boomers were the last generation to raise their children on homecooked — every Sunday — family meals. The generation after that knew the cashier of McDonalds and Arby’s on a first name basis. Waistlines have expanded accordingly. Now, even our first-graders have little pouches for stomachs that protrude while doing the most basic childhood exercises: running.
In Europe it’s not much better, but it seems that it is, especially in Eastern Europe, where they make models (you realize they make ‘em over there, right?).
Here’s a good reason why you haven’t heard the word “Eurotrash” in the last decade. Mainly because Ameritrash is getting much more obvious. Painfully so.

The People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals has made no bones about going after people — big and small — in their quest to bring awareness to the suffering of animals.
Oftentimes they do it in a public, very obtruse manner, some would say even mean-spirited. Their subjects are usually stuffy old people or unkempt young people who “didn’t know” the plight of those pigs, cows, elephants, beavers, etc., that make their way into the American and world marketplace.
But some people, sometimes, don’t take well to criticism. Take for instance, singer Kelis, who was recently slammed by PETA for wearing furs.
When Kelis got hit, Kelis hit back.
“There is no humane way to kill anything. It’s unfortunate but it’s part of life. With that being said, I would eat pterodactyl if you found some and you told me it was meaty and delicious. I eat meat, and in fact my mouth salivates as I type the word meat!”
Football player Michael Vick, also on the end of a PETA bodyslam, privately questioned the group’s motives when they allededly sent protesters to Atlanta Falcons owner Arthur Blank’s home.
PETA has been known to pelt celebrities and government officials with eggs and even throw pies.
Rapper Lil Kim, who raps about oral sex but also brandishing Lugars, has also caught shade from PETA over her furs.
Sooner or later, PETA is going to pick the wrong one, though. Sooner, rather, than later.

Just when you thought she had gone away, Los Angeles socialite Paris Hilton revealed that she and the pet pig she got last fall has gotten quite comfortable with each other. (This is not for the squeamish, squeenkish or oinkish).
She sleeps with a pig. No, not her boyfriend, Doug Reinhardt, but her actual pet, Miss Pigelett.
“Doug and I will be lying in bed, watching DVDs, and she’ll just lie there between us. She’s a little sweetheart and I love her,” Hilton told Contact Music.
Now, Ms. Hilton has been portrayed as pigish way before she got one, so this should come as little surprise. (Actually it’s rumored that she grocery-shops only at Piggly Wiggly — psyke).
But, see, this is why swine flu is out of control. Just sayin.